How long could you make 4 beers last?

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Matt
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How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Matt » Mon Apr 27, 2009 1:22 am

I was thinking about the $1500 thread earlier today and it hit me.

You're the last person alive, most of anything resembeling civilisation has been wiped out by nuclear war. You've been wandering the planet searching for survivors like yourself. One day you an ancient fridge clearly lined with shitloads of lead that contains 4 500ml cans of [INSERT BRAND] beer.

What the fuck would you do?
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by kaos » Mon Apr 27, 2009 2:31 am

Do I know that I'm the last person alive or not?

because it says I'm searching for survivors?

So I'm wondering how much of a factor that is.

Am I searching under the idea that I'm probably the last one alive?
or am I searching, and have no Idea if I am or not.
or am I searching, and I pretty much know I'm the last, but I'm in a sort of denial on the subject?

i think my answer changes under the different conditions.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Squirrel » Mon Apr 27, 2009 2:45 am

I'd proberbly drink one to keep my thirst out, save the rest for later or something. But hey you gotta live right? Fuck survivors though I'd be trying to survive myself. One survivor equals food, yeah I'd sure as fuck would resort to cannibalism in those dire situations. I don't want to think about that mind you.

At this moment I'd proberbly think I was better off dead.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Matt » Mon Apr 27, 2009 11:00 pm

kaos wrote:Do I know that I'm the last person alive or not?

because it says I'm searching for survivors?

So I'm wondering how much of a factor that is.

Am I searching under the idea that I'm probably the last one alive?
or am I searching, and have no Idea if I am or not.
or am I searching, and I pretty much know I'm the last, but I'm in a sort of denial on the subject?

i think my answer changes under the different conditions.
I saw it as though you're searching and you have no idea if you're the last one or not.

I think I see where you're going? You'd possbly save a beer for someone else? If I was the person you'd found I think I'd love you.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Chewi » Mon Apr 27, 2009 11:09 pm

This is a silly question in a way because you'd surely be able to get your hands on a lot more than 4 cans of beer and your existence could actually be quite cosy, if not boring, for a few years.

But if 4 cans of beer was really the best I could find (I think food would be more important), I'd probably drink them all at once in the hope that this, combined with my lack of nutrition, would get me very drunk and then I could kill myself in some crazy but merry way.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Squirrel » Mon Apr 27, 2009 11:47 pm

Wow, from you that's really depressing.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Chewi » Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:25 am

I don't think I explained my point properly. If you were unable to find more than 4 beers for some reason then it's unlikely you'd be able to find much food either. I dunno, maybe it was all contaminated in the blast or something. :P Actually, Matt did mention a lead-lined fridge so I guess he was implying that. If that were the case, I'd be pretty depressed, wouldn't you?
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Matt » Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:59 am

Chewi wrote:I don't think I explained my point properly. If you were unable to find more than 4 beers for some reason then it's unlikely you'd be able to find much food either. I dunno, maybe it was all contaminated in the blast or something. :P Actually, Matt did mention a lead-lined fridge so I guess he was implying that. If that were the case, I'd be pretty depressed, wouldn't you?
I was thinking I was like Tom Hanks in Castaway. I'd chalked out a survival routine and befriended several stray footballs. So one day on your berry picking day you find some beers and such.

I think in this situation I'd be a primitive monkey-thing barely recognisable as modern man. Which would be cool because I can imagine accute senses and the ability to vertically climb trees at impressive speeds.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Chewi » Tue Apr 28, 2009 1:13 am

I haven't seen that. Having seen BBC's Survivors not so long ago, I was thinking more along those lines.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by kaos » Tue Apr 28, 2009 4:48 am

I wasn't going to save just 1 beer.
I was gonna save them all.
They'd probably make great peace offerings if I ever did find someone else.


In a castaway situation where I'm making my own food on a daily basis...the beer would be a used sparingly as a special ingredient to make the puppy burgers go down easier.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Matt » Tue Apr 28, 2009 10:35 am

Only problem there is the beer going flat :( Nothing worse then flat beer. That'd only be comparable to finding out the last other living person is a dude and the human race is screwed, but you both have needs. That would suck.

Mik's not commented. He's having withdrawl at the very thought, I think.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Chewi » Tue Apr 28, 2009 11:43 am

Matt wrote:Only problem there is the beer going flat :( Nothing worse then flat beer.
Only if the beer you drink is fizzy piss.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Mik » Tue Apr 28, 2009 2:41 pm

I've been in the sticks in England for 10 days and for most of that totally unplugged to the webz0r, so that's my excuse.

I'd manage quite well without alcohol, I'm a pretty poor imitation of my national stereotype, that being that the Irish are drinkers, most of us are, just not I, hell 4 beers would probably be me quite pissed.


With, it's laughable but at least somewhat nutritional value, I don't see the point in lugging it around with me.

It's a diuretic, so it's not good for relieving thirst except temporarily.
It's a depressant, so maybe not the best thing to be taking in such dire circumstances.

Only useful thing is for medicinal purposes, as a pain suppressant, but the quantity and potency of beer (usually ~5%) means it might be a waste of time.


Still, on a hot day, with time to kill, might as well relax and have a wee bevy in situ, you've earned it.
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Matt » Tue Apr 28, 2009 2:45 pm

Chewi wrote:
Matt wrote:Only problem there is the beer going flat :( Nothing worse then flat beer.
Only if the beer you drink is fizzy piss.
I've not yet aquired the taste for bitters and ales :(
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Re: How long could you make 4 beers last?

Post by Squirrel » Tue Apr 28, 2009 6:02 pm

To be honest I agree with Mik and James on this one. Beer isn't the greatest thing on this planet, and depending on what you buy is absolutely shit.
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